"Letting Go of Control" | November 2, 2025 | Ps Joel Lowery

Life has a peculiar way of weighing us down. Like travelers who pack too much for a journey, we accumulate baggage along the way—control, bitterness, fear, and countless other burdens we were never meant to carry. The longer we walk through life, the heavier these invisible suitcases become, slowing our pace and stealing our joy.

Jesus spoke clearly about this when He said, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full" (John 10:10). Notice the contrast: the enemy wants to weigh you down, but Jesus came to give you life—abundant, overflowing, full life. Yet many of us struggle to experience this fullness because we're dragging baggage that was never ours to carry in the first place.

The Weight of Control

Perhaps no burden weighs heavier on modern believers than the illusion of control. We live in a culture that celebrates independence, self-determination, and personal achievement. From childhood, we're told we can be anything we want to be, that our lives are in our hands, that success depends on taking charge. These messages shape us, and before long, control becomes our default mode of operation.

Control manifests in countless ways. It's the manager who micromanages every detail. It's the parent who can't let their adult children make their own decisions. It's the spouse who tries to manipulate their partner into spiritual maturity. It's the person who obsesses over their image, terrified of what others might think. It's the perfectionist who mistakes rigid self-discipline for holiness.

Sometimes control masquerades as something noble. We call it "being responsible" or "taking initiative." But when control moves from healthy stewardship to anxious grasping, when we can't rest unless everything is exactly as we want it, we've crossed a dangerous line. We've essentially told God, "I don't trust You to handle this, so I'll do it myself."

The truth? Control is rooted in a lack of faith.

Mary's Revolutionary Response

Consider the story of Mary, a teenage girl engaged to her dream man, living in a small village with clear expectations for her future. Then an angel appears with news that shatters every plan she'd made. She would conceive a child—not through natural means, but through the Holy Spirit. She would carry the Son of God.

The text tells us Mary was "confused and disturbed" (Luke 1:29). Of course she was. This announcement threatened everything: her reputation, her engagement, her family's honor, her entire future. She had no idea how Joseph would react, what the townspeople would say, or how this impossible situation would resolve.

Yet Mary's response reveals a profound spiritual maturity: "I am the Lord's servant. May everything you have said about me come true" (Luke 1:38). Other translations render this as "Let it be to me according to your word."

Let it be.

Those three words capture the essence of surrender. Mary couldn't control what was happening to her. She couldn't manage how people would respond. She couldn't manipulate the outcome. She could only choose what to surrender to—and she chose to surrender to God's purpose, even when it made no sense.

The Choice Before Us

Mary faced a choice between her plans and God's purpose. Between her dreams and God's destiny. Between her desire for control and God's calling. She couldn't have both.

We face similar choices every day. When life throws us a curveball—an unexpected job loss, a health diagnosis, a relationship crisis, a financial setback—we stand at a crossroads. Will we frantically try to control the uncontrollable? Or will we surrender to God's purposes, trusting that He sees what we cannot?

Here's the liberating truth: You don't always have the power to control, but you always have the power to surrender.

You can't control whether your spouse follows Jesus, but you can surrender your desire to manipulate them. You can't control what others think about you, but you can surrender your need for approval. You can't control your adult children's choices, but you can surrender them to God's care. You can't control the economy, politics, or a thousand other things, but you can surrender your anxiety about them.

The Hard Truth About Surrender

Surrender comes with two challenging realities we must accept.

First, there's no such thing as partial surrender. You're either surrendered or you're not. You can't hold up one hand in worship while keeping the other firmly grasped around your plans. God doesn't want your leftovers or your conditional obedience. In Revelation, Jesus says He prefers people who are hot or cold—the lukewarm He spits out. Why? Because half-hearted surrender never leads to transformation.

Second, surrender isn't a one-time event—it's a daily choice. Even Jesus, in the Garden of Gethsemane, faced the agonizing decision to surrender His will to the Father's. "Not my will, but yours be done," He prayed (Luke 22:42). If Jesus needed to practice daily surrender, how much more do we?

Each morning presents fresh opportunities to take back control or to surrender again. You might surrender your marriage today and need to surrender it again tomorrow. You might surrender your career this week and need to surrender it again next month. This is the rhythm of following Jesus.

Why Surrender Matters

Jesus said something radical that turns our control-obsessed culture upside down: "If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it" (Matthew 16:25).

This is the paradox of the kingdom. The way up is down. The way to gain is to give. The way to find your life is to lose it. And the way to experience God's best is to surrender your control.

Why? Because God can do way more with your surrender than you can do with your control.

Think about it. When you're white-knuckling your life, trying to manage every detail, you're limited by your own strength, wisdom, and resources. But when you surrender to God, you tap into His unlimited power, His perfect wisdom, and His infinite resources.

The Invitation

What are you trying to control that's outside your control? What are you grasping so tightly that it's actually weighing you down, stealing your joy, and keeping you from the abundant life Jesus promised?

Maybe it's a relationship. Maybe it's your image or reputation. Maybe it's fear about the future. Maybe it's your children's choices. Maybe it's a situation at work. Maybe it's a dream that hasn't materialized the way you planned.

Today, you have a choice. You can keep trying to control the uncontrollable, exhausting yourself in the process. Or you can follow Mary's example and say, "Let it be. I am the Lord's servant. May everything You have said come true."

Surrender doesn't mean passivity or irresponsibility. It means actively choosing to trust God's purposes over your plans, His ways over your ways, His timing over your timeline.

The Christian life isn't about checking boxes or memorizing verses or maintaining appearances. It's about daily surrender to Jesus, letting Him form you into His image, trusting that His plans are better than yours.

So let it be. Release your grip. Open your hands. Surrender control.

Because when you do, you'll discover something beautiful: God's purposes for your life are far better than anything you could orchestrate on your own. And the life He offers—that full, abundant life—is found not in control, but in surrender.